Sometimes

Sometimes I do become frustrated.
Sometimes..I am angry.
Sometimes..I act out like a child.
Sometimes...I sit here and think, "you don't understand."
Sometimes, I have been disrespectful to you.
Sometimes, I haven't shown love like I should have.
Sometimes, I have treated you differently.
Sometimes, I sit there and am frustrated with myself.
Sometimes, I really hate myself.
Sometimes, I hate you.
Sometimes, I want to just...really raise my voice.
Sometimes, I don't understand anything at all.
Sometimes, I'm confused and figure, it doesn't matter anyways.

Sometimes...I wonder...why do I even bother?

Really...this is why I bother...

Sometimes, I Love.
Sometimes, I care.
Sometimes, I respect.
Sometimes, I treat you right.
Sometimes...I show love to everything and everyone.
Sometimes, I love myself.
Sometimes, I like and love you.
Sometimes, I know.
Sometimes, I am understanding.
Sometimes....everything matters.

Sometimes...I wonder why it is..
Sometimes...I wonder why I battle.

The battle is that sometimes..a battle is always going to be between you and who you are wishing to be and all that you are now.
Sometimes, it's about change.
Sometimes, it's not.

Sometimes, I wonder...what is it that is changing me now?

Sometimes, I would like to sit here and say, "It's me."

God...it's You, not sometimes, but all the time.

I battle and battle, the fight is a fight, through You of this fight of both different types of "Sometimes" a fight is won. Help me to love, ease to anger, ease to frustration, show fruit of the Spirit, grow in wisdom, realize and be thankful for all the blessings that are true blessings in life, especially Your son, Jesus, and to grow in You..not sometimes, but all the time. Help not only me, but all of Your people, and the lost or non believers out there in this world. We all need you, not just sometimes, but all of the time.

I pray this to You, Lord.

-Mak